I took the kids yesterday and went back to the shelter. I packed up what I could manage to fit into my car and I took all three of them to the shelter with me.
When we got there, the kids were off the wall wild (as they usually are in a new place..) and they kept running into the bedrooms of the other women who were staying there.
I also found out that Will has been reading my blog so I honestly think I am going to abandon writing here. I thought it was safe to post here. I was wrong.
He sent me a message yesterday. I messaged him and told him I went to the shelter. Now, let's take a good hard look at this, ok? My son told me (my 15-year-old) that Will has been asking him if I left yet. That means that he already had an idea that I want to leave.
Not only that, since he has been reading this blog, he knows exactly how I am feeling. Yet, he still tells me I am just a victim.
Back to the message I got last night when he realized I was gone. I messaged him and said I had taken the kids to the shelter. He messaged me a long message and told me I was a liar. That he had saved up all kinds of dirt on me and that he was going to show it all to my kids. I remember the last line of the message said if he never sees me again it will be to fucking soon and he hates me.
Let me tell you how broken my brain is. Despite all of the nasty things he said to me - I came back here. Where else am I going to go? I have nowhere to go.
He deleted the nasty message he sent to me before I got up this morning. I'm sure he also spent a good hour or so combing through my phone to make sure I'm being good.
Like I said, I won't be posting to this blog any longer. What difference would it really make anyway?
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